I think all our lives our parents have reminded us that part of “success” meant finding the one and settling down, and with the help (or not help) of relatives, we’ve heard a million renditions of what constitutes as “the one” even though often times, neither our parents nor relatives have really reached their own relationship idealisms, or more so, their idealisms do not match the standards of our new generation.

Because many of us were raised on relationship expectations that put us into boxes as “man and woman,” and as “dictating and submissive.”

And despite us running as far from it as we can, it still takes us a lifetime to shake off the examples we’ve seen in marriage and relationships.

Causing us to perhaps wonder if what we are asking for is too much, too unrealistic, and too rare.

I believe our twenties, is the time when we come to realize each day that everything we thought we knew about life, is no longer true, and that in order to become, sometimes we need to unbecome.

In order to learn and grow, we have to unlearn everything we once knew.

In all ordinary aspects of our lives, as well as the extraordinary.

Removing myself from everything I built, always knew, and defined myself as, to live abroad, doing something I've never done, taught me a few things that has made me more grounded than I've ever been.

They are things that I really wish everyone gets a chance to realize in this lifetime. Because life is too short, and too long.

I am just far too much sometimes. Too much of a lot things. Too much that I can completely understand that in these years of my becoming, why no one could last too long near me. Why things couldn’t hold onto me.

I Am Too Much.

"In order to heal, we must first forgive...and sometimes the person we must forgive...is ourselves." -Mila Bron To let go of the past and move on, is to be able to forgive all that has been done. To start a fresh, new year, a lot of letting go must be done. So here goes.

I forgive myself this year.

I forgive myself for being responsible in breaking my own heart.

Yesterday was #NationalComingOutDay and I could only admire in silence, all the stories of triumph, bravery and self-acceptance that the individuals I have been blessed to know, have lived through. An experience that I know even a 63,206 Facebook post character limit couldn't do justice to. But I realize, I never got to live my 'coming out' day.

Because for the longest time, I couldn't find a place to belong. And so I confided in the stories I'd see on the news that most hit home for me--the stories of the LGBTQ community.